The Power of Parents

Parents, you hold the weight of influence in your children's lives. To be honest, what I see many times happen in student's lives is just an overflow of what is happening in the home. I believe that although we are often a product of our environment, students can learn to surrender their lives to serving Christ. Leadership is caring for their soul more than their immediate happiness. I see this in many parents in the past 6-7 years of student ministry. In high school many parents decide that their child has arrived in complete spiritual maturity! Every decision is left up to their students such as church attendance, dating, money management and so forth. What many parents do is spend years and countless hours trying to help their child make the wise choice growing up and then when they become a high school student, they let go of leadership and expect their child to make the right choices. Parents, it is crucial that you stay focused even during the high school years of leading your students to Jesus, not stepping out of the picture. I believe this is the most important time to care more for their soul than their happiness. It is a hard time, they are struggling through who they are and their future plans.

You see, the more I work with students the more I see the importance of the environment in the home. Parents, what you do in moderation, you children will do in excess! Student ministers and churches only have a few hours a week to invest in students. Parents are the biggest influencers in the lives of their children. Period. Good or bad.

My parents were loving and passionate about serving Christ. I only say that because the person that I saw preaching the gospel on Sundays was preaching the gospel through his words and life during the week. God used my Dad and Mom to speak the gospel into my life which led to my salvation in the living room on my knees. They did not base serving God on feelings, what other people thought but based on the love that was received from Christ on the cross. Parents, you are so vital to a student's spiritual growth.

My prayer and exhortation for parents of students to be heroes for Christ:

- Dad: Surrender your LIFE to Jesus and live it out for your wife and children. It is the greatest gift to your family. Challenge your sons to make Jesus the center of their lives. Show them how to share their faith. Lead them to church! Not out of duty but because of your passion to serve and honor God. Teach your children that hobbies do not equal happiness, but joy comes through serving God with your gifts and abilities! In every way, point people to Jesus. Be a man. Never back down from truth. Love your wife like Christ loves the church. Be a protector. Be strong but gentle at heart. Teach your children that greed is the love of money. We need more men to stand for something and quit standing for things that do not matter in eternity!

- Mom: Love your children and husband like Christ. Model to your daughters the Proverbs 31 woman. Show them modesty, unconditional love and dedication to the gospel. Be submissive to your husband and work together as a team to serve God. Never be the parent that says, "Not my baby!" Be a leader of your children and care more for their holiness than their immediate happiness. Use your words to build people up and not tear them down. Say no to gossip and say yes to encouragement. Be active at church, small group and missions.

Leadership in the home is powerful. Take advantage of the time that your children are still home before they graduate high school! Don't be so fearful of them that you step out of the picture and release all control to their emotions, hormones and friend's decisions. Care for their soul and lead them to serve Jesus!

Competition or Teamwork?

I am a competitive person. For those that know me, this is an understatement. I thoroughly enjoy the excitement of competition on the basketball court, tennis court, video game or anything else! I think it is a fun and enjoyable thing to be competitive. But, competition can become an idol in life that controls feelings and emotions. The sudden ending to a sporting event reveals a winner and a loser (besides soccer). The temporary excitement of watching your favorite football team win is fun. As leaders, we need to stop competing against other churches. Scripture never says one church in the kingdom is the only "crown jewel" of the overall kingdom. We need to start teaming up instead of competing against other student ministries, churches and relationships. Satan was the first to compete with God before the garden of Eden! This then led to Satan tempting Adam and Eve to compete against God's commands. On and on we see the dangers of competition that is based on pride and not the grace of God.

Is it true that the same attitude from playing sports has seeped into the hearts of ministry leaders? I remember playing flag football in Bible college. Future church leaders would treat an intramural flag football game as if it was the Superbowl!? Competition was an understatement. I really enjoyed the fun and exciting competition between my classmates (besides a few instances)!

But what happens when we apply this same intensity and excitement to comparing other churches or ministries to our own? I think it creates walls of separation and creates "little kingdoms" instead of serving the actual kingdom of God. It creates an "elitist" attitude that comes out of competition with other ideas, strategies and churches. As leaders, we should always pursue excellence in everything we do but not at the motive of demeaning other leaders that are serving God. What would happen if leaders quit competing and started encouraging each other to improve in ministry?

Paul exhorted and rebuked the early church on the dangers of competition:

  "Brothers and sisters, I could not address you as people who live by the Spirit but as people who are still worldly—mere infants in Christ. I gave you milk, not solid food, for you were not yet ready for it. Indeed, you are still not ready. You are still worldly. For since there is jealousy and quarreling among you, are you not worldly? Are you not acting like mere humans? For when one says, “I follow Paul,” and another, “I follow Apollos,” are you not mere human beings? What, after all, is Apollos? And what is Paul? Only servants, through whom you came to believe—as the Lord has assigned to each his task. I planted the seed, Apollos watered it, but God has been making it grow. So neither the one who plants nor the one who waters is anything, but only God, who makes things grow. The one who plants and the one who waters have one purpose, and they will each be rewarded according to their own labor. For we are co-workers in God’s service; you are God’s field, God’s building." 1 Corinthians 3:1-8

I'm thankful for the friends in my life that continue to walk with me through ministry. It is about the relationship of running the race of ministry with other leaders that encourages me the most. Helping each other personally is to help each other with their lives and personal relationship with God. Why does everyone want to only talk about their attendance numbers, music style, or size of church?

^"Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving. Anyone who does wrong will be repaid for their wrongs, and there is no favoritism." Colossians 3:23-25

Check out what Craig Groeschel says, I agree completely:

As leaders, we are in this together. Let's be competitive about helping each other succeed in our calling to serve the church. Success to God is faithfulness to the calling on our lives more than the numbers, sizes of buildings and bank accounts. Encourage each other and focus on the relationship more than performance. We all need encouragement right? We are on the winning team if we know and serve Jesus Christ! Let's be a team for the kingdom of God!

Unrealistic Reality

Social networking is a great ''invention" and has helped many people stay connected all across the world. Just as Facebook, Google+(not sure yet on this one), Twitter, and whatever else comes along are helpful, they can bring about obstacles to reality. We have a culture that is obsessed with creating an unrealistic profile online. It is much like wearing a mask that reveals a different person for others to see than who we are in reality. It is basically an unrealistic reality that we want people to perceive about us. I've heard this statement before, "perception is reality." It can be true but it really is not. We can "front" all we want about what we want to be, but God ultimately knows us! "You have searched me, LORD, and you know me.2 You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. 3 You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. 4 Before a word is on my tongue you, LORD, know it completely." Psalm 139:1-4 (NIV)

Do we care more about what people think than our Savior? It is easy to try to be something that we are not. Honesty should be a non-negotiable for those who claim to follow Christ. Why do we think we can try and lie to people when God already sees our heart?

When we understand our sinful state and clearly receive God's grace, we will grasp the reality of God! The world thrives on unrealistic reality through media everyday. God created us for worship, not of ourselves but Him! We must build our identity upon who He is and what He has done through the cross and resurrection! He makes us realize we are valuable and worthy. Reality is no longer just perceived but becomes crystal clear through a relationship with Christ!